…we are often taught to follow the ‘model answers’ demonstrated for us, and we consequently find ourselves moving through life in a very ‘standardised way’.

Nonetheless, for the first time in my life, I was surrendering to each moment without (over-)analyzing my surroundings and myself. The weeks flew by, and unaware of the passage of time I found myself a different person at the end. I believe all of us, Jia Min, Dameris, Ying, Xin Rui, Darryl, and I find ourselves slightly different people at the end.

I already knew that coming here, it’s not going to be a walk in the park. But what this work demands, it is not just stamina, but all of my attention and presence. If I ever so slightly let my mind drift, I am no longer here. This applies to our day to day that we take so easily for granted. 

My journey has been bittersweet and there are times where I question if the stress I felt before and during the sessions was worth it. In my case, I was challenged emotionally, mentally and physically.

Very often I forget to be open. I forget how closed I am. How uninterested I am in truly communicating, and instead just focused on speaking. How uninterested I am in responding to what you are doing, instead bulldozing my way through the world. I invite you because I believe you are more open than me, and because of your openness, I will be transformed.

Watching these four participants evolve over the course of the…well, course, was an immensely rewarding experience for me as well, because I was able to explore my own limits alongside them. I recall running into the same walls they ran into when I was a participant, and I find new walls that need to be pushed against, if not broken down. It’s the cliche that teaching others often lets you learn better as well, and well, it’s a cliche because it’s true.

The unknown is scary.